25 Uplifting and Funny Pregnancy Quotes


Delivering a child is one of the most miraculous things that happen in this world. A woman who is pregnant is sure to feel on top of the world, as she gets that extra reason to love herself and the entire world. Being pregnant is an experience in itself and when people come to wish and offer their congratulatory messages, it is a heavenly feeling. There are many who really make pregnancy a divine thing and such people also give you some of the best quotes that you would always reminisce and be amused later about.

Some of the funny pregnancy quotes are such that they provide you rib tickling laughter while there are many, which invoke a sense of responsibility and care. Let us see what these small time quotes are, and how they can humor us. Surely, it would be relaxing to be pregnant and not worry about so many other things in this world. Amidst this, when there are some of the funniest quotes, then they are worth a read. Read the following quotes and smile at the humorous touch to your otherwise difficult pregnant state. Remember laughter is the best medicine, so never mind, if you are slightly fatigued, just laugh at these quotes and feel relaxed.

If you like this article, you might be interested in some of our other articles on Funny Valentines Day Quotes, Inspirational Quotes About Life and Love, Short Quotes About Family and Famous Sports Quotes.

Matthew Broderick Quote

“Having a baby changes the way you view your in-laws, I love it when they come to visit now. They can hold the baby, and I can go out.” – Matthew Broderick

Churchill Quote

“There is no finer investment for any community than putting milk into babies.” – Churchill

Pregnancy Were

“If pregnancy were a book they would cut out the last two chapters.”

Diaper Backward

“Diaper backward spells repaid. Think about it…”

Dave Barry Quote

“It is a well-documented fact that guys will not ask for directions. This is a biological thing. This is why it takes several million sperm cells… to locate a female egg, despite the fact that the egg is, relative to them, the size of Wisconsin.” – Dave Barry

Pregnant Again

“YES, I’m pregnant again. YES, I know what causes it. NO I don’t think I’ve had too many!”

Suzanne Finnamore Quote

“You are the closest I will ever come to magic.” – Suzanne Finnamore

Jeanette Winterson Quote

“When a woman gives birth her waters break and she pours out the child and the child runs free.” – Jeanette Winterson

Arranged That Husbands


“If nature had arranged that husbands and wives should have children alternatively, there would never be more than three in a family.”

Your Excuse

“I’m not fat I’m pregnant what’s your excuse?”

Touch My Belly

“Unless you are the one who put this baby in here or the one who will take it out, you are not allowed to touch my belly!”

Gregory Maguire Quote

“We only have babies when we’re young enough not to know how grim life turns out.” – Gregory Maguire

Bill Cosby Quote

“Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.” – Bill Cosby

Teen Pregnancy

“Teen pregnancy in the 90’s: Damn, my life is OVER! Teen pregnancy today: MTV here I come!”

James Baldwin Quote


“There is a sanctity involved with bringing a child into this world, it is better than bombing one out of it.” – James Baldwin

Love Stronger

“A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for.”

Christine Feehan Quote

“Of course I can do this. I’m pregnant, not brain-damaged. My condition doesn’t change my personality.” – Christine Feehan


“I’m a Pregasauraus… mess with me and you’ll be extinct.”

Leo J. Burke Quote

“People who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one.” – Leo J. Burke

Kin Hubbard Quote

“The worst feature of a new baby is its mothers singing.” – Kin Hubbard

Pretty Much

“You can hear now. Your inner ear is formed. I shout “I love you” into the bedroom. Then I feel stupid. Then I don’t. This is pretty much the story of my life.”

Stephen Wright Quote

“My friend has a baby, I am recording all the noises he makes so I can later ask him what he meant.” – Stephen Wright

Spreading Out

“They’re spreading out. Look unaware and sweet and innocent. It’s a little hard to look innocent when I’m as big as a house.”

Charles Osgood Quote

“Babies are always more trouble than you thought, and more wonderful.” – Charles Osgood

Ed Howe Quote

“Families with babies, and families without babies are sorry for each other.” – Ed Howe



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